Getting back into the swing of things...

It's been ages since I last posted. Life took hold of me, shook the keyboard from my clutches and turned me around. We've had illnesses, and triumphs and disappointments. But everyone's ok (more or less). :-)

I've been meaning to write for about a week, but so much time has passed I didn't know where to start!

So here I am, taking the plunge, and getting right back into it.

I have a neighbourkids update for you! If you don't know what I'm talking about check out this post to get all caught up.

Ok so for a while things continued much as they always did - younger NK would appear at the door with his cheery self, BUT he does now get that sometimes it's too early and he needs to come back. He really does have quite a fun personality. Very impulsive. Very energetic. It can be quite a challenge to hold back a laugh at some of his antics. Like his "special move" in Wii Sports tennis. Remind me to demonstrate some time... ;-)

Older NeighbourKid - not as much fun. He just seemed to find a way to push people's buttons, and I'm still not sure why. As a matter of fact, one night all the grownups and kids were all hanging out and he was so rude to his mother throughout that whole night that I really thought long and hard about talking to her to find out why she let him act out the way he does.

Not necessary.

A couple nights later, she and I sat around and just hung out at her house, and the child I saw then was a very different child. He was funny, and sweet. And I thought well this must be the child she knows! And it was just too hard for me to tell her how he acts out, because I am convinced now that she would not be amused.

She made it a point to tell me how well-behaved mine were, and that my oldest corrects hers when he's rude to her. Something along the lines of "Dude you can't talk to your mom like that. She's your MOM."

I think now that he knows his mom and I talk, we'll see a lot less acting out, because he knows it could get back to her. He seems to get his moods here and there, but the kids know how to move around him now, and his grumpiness doesn't seem to affect them any more.

So the whole situation seems to have worked itself out for the best. Phew! Weight off my shoulders!

So how have you guys been?

I'll be stopping by to visit starting today. I have lots of catching up to do!

Neighbourkids Update

For those of you kind enough to give me your advice on my neighbourkid situation, I know you've been wondering how that turned out. Wellll..... I haven't said anything. I've been keeping the front door closed until I'm "ready for company" And it's hot here. Usually my door is open once we wake up, and we get lovely breezes going through the house.

Boo! non-confrontational scaredy me...

It's not that I'm really scaredy, it's just that I think it would be really easy to come away with misunderstandings that would filter down to the kids and make them feel terrible. Or make the mom feel terrible. And that's not what I want at all...

So what is it that I want?

Well I want there to be that respect for the adults in the house. From my kids, and any of their visiting friends. I was raised to be polite to the parents first - Good morning! Hello! Thank you!

The younger neighbourboy used to just wander in silently and just. stand. there. You'd never even know he was there, or how long he was there. But we had a couple little chats about how I'd love to hear him say "Good morning!" when he comes in, and he does it so well and so cheerily now, that it really does make me smile, and I don't mind his visits. I do sometimes mind the HOURS of the visits, but we're getting there...

What irks me to no end though is when the older brother comes to stand just beyond my front door and sends the younger brother in to do his bidding. Which usually entails calling my oldest boy outside so that he can quietly ask him to go do something they both know I have forbidden.

What's with the sneakiness? You want to play with my kids, but you'll only approach them if the parents aren't around. You'll play with them, but only where YOU want to, even if it means they have to leave the friends and game their currently engaged in. What?! Where is this kid getting this?

Not a fan of sneakiness in children or adults, I positioned myself on the verge of their play the other day so I could hear better the whisperings of Neighbourboy. Imagine my surprise to hear:

1. Trying to convince the younger kids to gang up on the little girl upstairs to not play with her because he doesn't like her. And yet, he plays with her all the time. But her younger sister - she's cool - you can play with her. I was so mad.
2. Relentless non-step mocking of my oldest as he was practicing a new game of marbles his dad had taught all the kids to play the day before. (You STILL can't get that? You suck you know that? Oh and by the way, you suck.) Hey kid! Take a breath! 

Well NOW I understand why he never wants to try any new games we're playing out in the yard. I thought his being overweight was the barrier, but now I know he's afraid to fail. And that makes me sad. But it goes against everything I teach my boys about learning from failure... so you know who transformed into Cheerleader! That's right,

Job Description section 3A - Mommy will act as Cheerleader to encourage and motivate her brood.

Clearly this kid has some issues to sort out. And I really do feel bad for him. I don't think any of his actions are really motivated from a wicked place, but I do think that they need some attention. How exactly do you say that to a mom?


Hey! Your kid seems to be a little short on the manners and seems to be sorting through some self-esteem issues. Gonna work with him a little on that when he comes to visit, ok? Alrighty then! Nice flowers! Bye!

I have no idea how I'm going to eventually handle this one. But if they're going to be around, they're going to know what is acceptable and not in this house.

Any parents or teachers out there with advice on how to encourage more constructive behaviours and self-esteem in a kid like this? I could really do with the advice!

On a side note I have to tell you about Sakura Bloom's sample sale going on right now! These are limited quantity, seriously gorgeous, silk and linen baby slings, so they're bound to go fast. Perfect gift for mothers of little ones, and moms-to-be!

Nobody from Sakura Bloom has any idea I'm writing this - I've always admired their slings, and I found out about their sale from Stephanie at AdventuresInBabywearing.com.